Are were really the same people we were, when we were young.

The question that I often ask myself is, am I the same person today as I was in my twenties.

Some of us would argue that we change so much in a decade that we are very different people today, yet we live our lives with partners that we hooked up with when we were younger versions of ourselves. This might not be such a big deal. 

Couples evolve over time, and good couples evolve together. 

We would like to think that there is a core belief, or  identity that has remained the same from the beginning. This is "who we are" and what makes us different. 

If we were a corporation or a  product,  this would be the constitution, or feature list.  Most of us would like to believe that we grew up knowing what kind of person we were, and wanted to be and that at the very least that part has remained unchanged. 

I remember when I was young and in business.  

While everything we had was circling the drain, and about to go down the tubes. 

We prayed for success, and our prayer fell on deaf ears.  

I could not meet my payments, and literally lived from hand to mouth. 

Slowly slipping under the weight of failing business. 

The sudden spate of armed robberies was not the reason we quit, but just the last straw. 

When we moved to Durban, we had a break-in and all my cloths were stolen. 

Every garment I owned including my wedding suit. 

If I had come to Durban with the "shirt on my back". I literally, lost even that shirt!

In our darkest moment, when it seemed like God had forsaken us, and we were all alone, everything changed, all at once.  

Completely. 

I see now how we had to give up that old life, and, stop holding on to the past in order to fully appreciate the gifts we were about to receive, but we didn't know this at the time. 

We had to be broken down, to be build up again. 

We thought our prayers were being ignored. 

Looking back now it occurs to me that if we did indeed get all the things we had asked for, our lives would be sad and so small.  Our outlook was so limited. 

We didn't even know what to ask for. 

And  bounty of Allah was in  granting us not what we needed, or thought we needed, but what we should have been asking for,  if  we could see what he saw. 

Moral of the story, never despair. 

There is a plan, for us, and a place for us. 

And we have to wait for it, and embrace it. 

And if its the plan that was written for you, (the blueprint) then even though you may face great obstacles, it will all seem easy. 

Despite all struggles you will stand tall. 

Like in my favourite dua. 

The part of the Isthikhara that I love. 

Oh Allah If this is Good for my Imaan, and success in this life and the next make it easy for me and bless the venture. 

If it be bad for my Imaan, then move it away from me and me away from it and make me accept the outcome. 

(something to that effect) 

If you fight against the plan, it feels like uphill always,  and when you finally find and  follow the plan, the wind is in your sails and difficult paths seems easy.